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Friday, March 13, 2015

Book Review: The Vortex Entrance

 

Where do I even begin with this book?  It sucked. Really it did. It was written by a 14 year old. Now, not to say that being 14 makes you a bad writer, as evidenced by my friend Aimee @ To the Barricade! who is 14, but when I was 14, my writing sucked. Any self-published book must be taken and read with the reminder that there could have been no editing involved in the process.
There was none with this book. 

I was a little worried when my grandmother first alerted me to the existence of the book, as she often nags me about publishing and writing. I was worried that I'd get hammered with "He's 14 and published, why aren't you?"

Originally I was planning on annotating the book to see if there was anything worth learning. Because clearly any 14 year old who's published knows a thing or two about writing.
I was wrong.

Oh, was I wrong.

I have started editing his book. 

The first sentence was "I sit on my bed, a tired wreck, since I've been up for hours."

Not too great, but not entirely hateful. Now, a few side notes, I've always mildly disliked present tense. If it's written well and I like the story, I don't mind it, but if the story and characters are mediocre, it stands out not unlike a sore thumb. That was my original problem with Divergent, to be honest, I didn't like the main character. She whined too much and it was written in a tense I don't particularly like. It makes for starting out on the wrong foot.

Fortunately, the main character has almost no personality, so I didn't have anything to worry about there.

If I went on about all the errors I found in the book, we'd be here forever, but I will say I found a to/two/too error. "...where do you go home too?"
Yeah. It's bad.

Anyhow, after I found that, I wanted to check out the publishing company he used: Ink'n'Beans Press.
(That comic sans)

Go ahead, take a look. Stare. Stare in horror. Then run. Run far, far away. Please never ever let them publish anything of yours. Ever.

Anyway, the book was terrible. The characters were flat, the plot was cliche, and the writing was atrocious, but guess what?

He's coming out with a sequel!!

Have you ever read anything by a young author? What do you think about Ink'n'Beans press? Is the song stuck in your head now?